Grand Haven Lighthouse

Grand Haven Lighthouse
sunset

Monday, December 3, 2012

Friends ?

With all that is over now I realize that I am truly by myself.  The friends who came to the wake were our friends met through Art and are couple friends.  People he worked with and their spouses.  But what now.  I am the first of all our friends to be widowed.  I am now a freak without a half what will happen now.  I hate this new normal as its stated in the books I have read. 

Money wise we will scrape by after I cut out some more spending.  I'm down to bare bones now well almost not sure where i can cut some more.  I can take the full coverage off the van since its at last paid for hopefully that will reduce some cost.  Loosing the rental would help a lot too but houses dont sell in the late fall winter months.  Just my luck.

My right leg is hurting very badly.  Not sure what I did to it but it has been hurting since I was off and one the little stepstool painting in the kitchen.  I have a pair of crutches Im using to keep the weight off my leg.  AFter all it only hurts when I put weight on it.  Im not sure if its an arthritis flair up caused by the wet winter weather or  by all the stress of the past months.  Either way nothing is helping with the pain.  I have a patch stuck on it right now but it still hurts.

We have a break during school classes right now and an assessment that has to be taken about a book that we just finished reading.  So we will be working on that shortly.

So now what.  All is over and I have not heard from any of the family from DC either.  I guess I am not longer part of their family with him gone.  So friends and family have deserted me.  I have a long time to be lonely.