Grand Haven Lighthouse

Grand Haven Lighthouse

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Well its almost middle of February

Here we go I have not kept up with mhy blogging as I hoped I would.  I am not sure why maybe cause I dont have a life so not much to write about.  Hmmm.  Need to do something about that for sure.

Its a cold and snow flurry kinda day.  Need to concentrate on paying bills today as well as working on a jewelry piece that I am currently making.  Its a bit boring so my interest isnt in it.  I think perhaps I will start another project and then go back and forth between the two that way it will be less boring and perhaps i will finish it at a faster clip.

I have been emailing a gentleman who sounds fascinating.  Of course I will take my time to get to know him prior to meeting up.  Plus he doesnt live in town so that might be a plus right now.  Not sure what I want except maybe someone to have fun with right now.  Im not looking to be married again.  1st marriage was bad, second one was great but I dont think I can find anyone that would take his place even with him gone.  Besides at times I enjoy being able to do something when I want and with whom I want.  But I still miss him so very much and always will.

2 new bracelets that I have recently made.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Working on Items

I am working on a graphghan for myself its of a phoenix rising done in background of cream and the phoenix is variegated reds to simulate fire.  So far progressing nicely.

The other project is a peyote stitched bracelet.  I am doing it as a challenge piece for a facebook group I am part of now.  Each month the group picks a bead weaving stitch to try and you have to make something with the stitch.  We will see what the next one is but for now I am working on they peyote stitch.

My high blood pressure is back it went away for a while after my left knee replacement but now its back and I am back on my medicine for it.  Sigh.

The left knee replacement didn't help my back much.  I still cant stand very long without the back hurting.  Although the good news is when I stand my left knee doesn't hurt as it did.  My right knee was replaced for a 2nd time in 2013 so now I have new knees (well fairly new with the right) and look forward to spring and getting out walking and hopefully bike riding.  I am only 6 weeks post knee replacement and afraid with snow and Ice to go out much for walking.  Besides its bitter cold as well right now.

Winter finally arrived after a prolonged fall but still having off and on mild days in the 40s so not much snow yet this year.

Tuesday, December 29, 2015


I have fallen in love with making hand woven beaded medallions.  Most likely for earrings and necklaces but not sure yet.  Could be joined for bracelet and necklaces as well I think.

I have made 4 so far various sizes and working on a new one right now with cube beads.

Sunday, December 27, 2015


Christmas has come and gone.  So much fuss for something that is over so fast but I love the kids opening their presents.  I also love the look on their faces when they open something that they really wanted.

I have been shunned by all of my late husbands kids.  I never thought that the oldest one would ignore me but he did.  Not a call did I receive on Christmas, Thanksgiving, when I was in the hospital with my knee replacement, and on Halloween the day my husband died.  I guess I do not have the family that I thought I had.

I had a girl friend come over for Christmas Dinner with the kids and Mom she would have been alone on Christmas afternoon so she came to my house for dinner and some presents.  I hope she had a great time as she is having issues with one of her kids and was down about it.  I so enjoyed having her with me.  Once my Mom has passed on I will have friends who don't have anywhere to do on Christmas come over for dinner.  The more the merrier.  I will fix turkey then again.  My mother does not like turkey so we have a roasting chicken and dressing for Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I will learn to make her cranberry salad as I love it.  My dressing is fabulous and sweet potatoes roasted as well.

Now on to New Years I have no one special to share it with nor any place to go.  I will watch Michigan State University Spartans take on Alabama in the cotton bowl on New Years Eve and maybe the rose bowl on New Years day otherwise its just a day.

I am making some jewelry again now that I can sit at my desk for longer periods of time.  My left knee healed nicely but still is painful if I walk to much on it.  Cant wait for spring so that I can start walking and loose more weight.

I am working on the cross stitch sampler again.  Its to represent my husband and its almost done.  I think I will but his initials on it and make a pillow out of it for my day bed.  I so want a full size bed but cant afford it.

Sunday, December 20, 2015

My Jewelry for Sale

I am going to post my jewelry that I make here.  I hand weave all my creations using beading thread, beading needles, and various beads.  I use a lot of seed bead when I make these awesome necklaces, bracelets and earrings.  I also make sets occasionally.  Let me know what you think of my creations.  email me at to find out prices and availability.

this is a black and white pearl necklace cost is $13.00 plus postage  18 in

this is a gray and black pearl necklace with seed beads $13.00 plus postage 18 in   Much more to come once i download them from Instagram

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

December 15, 2015

Well I got out yesterday first day since I had my left knee replaced the day before Thanksgiving.  Once a month some of the ladies that I graduated high school with get together and have lunch at a local restaurant that is owned by another one of our long ago class mates.  It was nice getting out hard to get comfortable though I kept trying to make the left knee comfortable not much luck there yet.  Came home tired and took a nap I guess that is normal while healing from surgery of only two weeks ago.

However, as much as I enjoyed getting out once the lunch is over I have only one friend.  The ladies talk with me but after wards they talk to each other on facebook and on the phones etc but I am completely forgotten.  I dont know how to reach out anymore I have tried but never heard back from others.

My one best friend is the one I grew up on the same street with.  She and I met at junior high school and graduated from the same high school all those years ago.  Then we lost touch for over 30 some years as we both married, moved away raised out kids, and worked.  In 2013 we met up at an inprompto brunch that some of us old time grads wanted to get together and catch up.    She is the only one now that talks to me and makes sure I am alright.  She and I talk often and we take care of her pups when she needs us too.  this year I am making her a delightful birthday cake.

So I am always lonely these days and I miss Art each and every day.  But at Christmas its huge that he is gone as he loved to decorate outside and inside for it.  We always started decorating the Friday after Thanksgiving inside and outside lights before it got cold.  Here in the new house we dont decorate much no room for my Nativity set I made or my village.  We have a few lights up outside and the tree of course but that's about all now days.

Sunday, December 13, 2015

December 2015

Another Christmas almost upon us.  I have had a ok year.  Bankruptcy was finalized, student loans were forgiving since I am now disabled and unable to work.  Daughter was in a boot all spring, summer until October for tearing her tendon and muscle around her ankle.  Now I am recovering from my left knee being replaced.  Two years ago my right knee was replaced for the second time.  I now have two new knees and hope that it will help me with my weight loss and pain level.

I have had some blood pressure issues since the surgery which was on the day before Thanksgiving.  My blood pressure would not come up I was in recovery for longer than normal and had to stay a day longer due to lightheartedness and low blood pressure and low oxygen saturation level.

I have to cancel my surgeons post op appointment since I dont have money for the co pay.  Have to reschedule it after the first when I have money again.  I was only able to get Alex one present due to the cost of the laptop.  I hope he is happy with it.  Mom got him a few things as did Beth.

I dont want anything for Christmas what do I need.  I got new shoes and snow boots that is all I really needed.

Christmas still seems not as festive and happy as it once was since Atttila (Art) is no longer among us.  He so loved decorating inside and out for Christmas and Halloween as well actually.  I feel blah now at Christmas even though I fight it.  Our wedding anniversary in Sept.  doesn't bother me as much now either so maybe one day Christmas wont feel so blah.  Halloween the day he died will always be in my mind and heart.  The day he left me all alone.

Now onward to face Christmas and the New Year.  New Year new beginnings!!!!!!

Sunday, September 27, 2015

45th high school reunion

Last night was my 45th high school and I am on the reunion committee.
And one thing is abundantly clear to me I am no more part of them now as in high school.  Always sitting alone most of the time.  None of the people except a very few approached me mostly I was ignored and lonely.

Maybe my curse now is to be alone always to be a failure.  Things have gone so far south since Art died 3 years ago.  I know not how to make friends or to put myself out there apparently.  I am destined to be this way for acting as I did when younger?

I have tried to make friends with some people but I am always out the outside looking in to close friends and relations.  Also almost all of the people are not fat as I am and they have spouses to be with.  I guess this will always be my lot in life looking but never included.

Yes I am down and lonely and a failure.